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"We kissed at the door, I could have gone further, I knew that I could have done anything with her.If I'd opened my dressing gown and told her to go down on me there and then, she would have done so without any hesitation. But there was a danger that in her heightened and fragile emotional state that she might have thought that I was having second thoughts about my feelings for her. I gave her another peck on the cheek and opened the front door. This was a turning point for us. I'm sure that she was hoping that at the last moment I would buckle and ask her to stay the night.A look of deep sadness clouded her face as she turned and walked down the path. I waved and she half-heartedly waved back. I closed the door and leant against the wall, I felt awful. I felt bad for Lena and I felt worse about myself. How was I going to keep lust and love separate? I wanted sexual gratification, just that, nothing more. Others, it seemed wanted something more profound, something lasting. I'd have to. Beat off.” I sat down on the couch and did exactly that.As I was fucking my hand, I had to ask her a question: “Do you ever watch Jake masturbate?”.She tried to contain herself but she couldn’t. She broke out in laughter. “Oh no, of course not! Did you look at him? Between me and his other girlfriends, Jake probably gets to fuck every day of the week! I’ll bet Jake doesn’t even know how to masturbate!”Then her face turned serious. “You’re jealous aren’t you? Look honey, I’m sorry but you simply have to accept who you are. You can’t be like Jake. You know that right? But it’s OK, honey, I’m going to turn you into the happiest masturbator who ever lived. You’re going to be my little jack-off!”“Couldn’t we just have sex one time?” I pleaded.“Oh you mean a pity fuck” she said. “Listen I’ve been thinking about that and I think it’s a really bad idea. If I let you fuck me once then you’re going to want to do it again, and… I don’t think we should go down that road. I might ruin what we.
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